Saturday, April 7, 2007
Today so tired sia.. Slept at like 1 plus last night.. actually is 1 plus am today.. HAHA!! and woke up at 7.. I am dead, dog, very, anything else u can think of, tired.. This is the 3rd week i going with so little sleep.. damn scared i will peng soon.. Haha.. nvm la.. at most die only.. Then can like guardian angel and watch over her.. *Smiles* So good lor.. If only..If only i had the real power to protect someone.. I mean i cannot possible help her until its too late cuz i also not with her like every so oftenly.. By the time it happens, it might be too late le.. Hope God can protect her then.. Haishzz.. Sometimes i like gonna go crazy.. Cuz i really dunno if i should tell her.. Zzzzz.. that she is the woman in my heart.. But like i said be4, it would most probably start a cold war.. Dun believe then if u are a gal reading this blog.. Ask urself, if i were to tell u suddenly i like u.. Wun ur first reaction be at first Secretly happy, and at the same time, plan to avoid him?? Cold War will break up, causing many bilateral relationships with frens of U and me to suffer too.. Believe now?? So i cannot afford to tell her.. I cannot.. I have made this mistake a few times le.. and it all ended the same way.. And i cannot afford to lose her even as a fren..(Not like we are close) Yeah.. As long as she happy i jiu happy le.. Yeah.. But sometimes it can be so tempting to tell.. So i need to control, cuz i dun wan to be like at unspeakable terms with her.. Yeah.. So i am confused, My heart vs my brain.. To tell or not to tell.. That is the question..
Anyway, today was a nice day. To put it briefly, i went to NUS early in the morning and attended the Briefing for the SMUN(Singapore Model of the United Nations).. So cool la.. Saw someone who backstab me there.. I sort of tao him.. But he didn't approach me anyway.. Haha.. Can smell his guilt, and his fear and confusion on whether i know the truth..(details available in one of my entries.. The one where got alot of alphabets de.. haha.. Anyway, i had to leave early for church cuz Leo going along and i cannot be late.. Haha.. Sad thing was Leo didn't convert la.. :(
Anyway after service, as usual went to eat with my church frens.. And i sort of accidentally offended Gideon.. SO sorry.. :( Haishzz.. (must find time to apologise) Anyway.. then Leo and I went to cathy and into adidas.. Oh ya.. Saw Yanni there sia.. and her 1st 3 months frens.. Bryan was there too.. HAHA!! And so is the gal who sort of (jokingly i think) Love him alot.. and force bryan to say he like her too.. haha.. so funny.. should have seen bryan's face..
Anyway Leo bought his Gym stuff and after playing the XBox game available there for awhile, I had to chao, to go pay respect to my deceased grandfather.. yeah.. yadda yadda.. Reach there and bowed to him. then went go eat lor.. talked to my uncles about christianity.. he said that I was wrong to say Catholics will not be salvated cuz we dunno what God thinks about it.. Haishzz. dunno la.. very confused.. Just hope he is right.. Cuz if not.. i will feel sad.. esp for shirlene.. and some other frens too.. some not included in my sympathy list though, think some of u will know who.. yeah.. Haishzz.. After that i walked home.. And viola.. Here i am.. OKOK!! thats for now.. Really miss my Jie, Charlotte and shirlene sia.. MONDAY COME SOON!!! :)
CHeerios.. sorry if anyone is looking forward to my poem but time like very constraint for me.. needa stabalise first then think of poems.. :) thanks..
carved upon my life at 7:34:00 PM